My incredibly sweet big boy,
Yesterday, you turned three… THREE! Where has the time gone? As I sit here and listen to your dad read you your bed time stories over the monitor with my feet finally propped up and my big belly containing your little brother competing to get in the way of my typing hands, one word plays again and again in mind – joy. You are so full of joy and so full of life. When people look at you, its hard not to smile. That little grin, those blue eyes, those sweet cheeks. And then you begin to talk and the funniest things come out of that mouth of yours. Joy. That’s what you bring to your father and I and we are so incredibly thankful for you.
And with all this joy comes along all of the scary things that being your mom brings… you see, you are our world, so naturally, there will be times where my greatest fears threaten to become reality. Like that time that the front door was left unlocked and I couldn’t seem to find you anywhere… and for a whole minute my heart stopped beating…. until I heard faint giggles from behind the red curtain in the living room where you were standing completely still and silent in an innocent game of hide and seek. There was that time this spring where you finally got on your big boy bike, without the assistance of mom and dad. You were at the top the hill in our driveway and thought you would go for a ride. You proudly shouted, “look dad!!” before the “aaah” in dad turned into the most panic stricken “ahhhhhhhh” we’ve heard, as your increasing speed sent you right into the side door of the Jeep! Letting you on your bike without my hands close by is not something that came easily this year for me… looking back, we laugh now (a lot…) and I realize that you came out of that first accident without a scratch… but it won’t always be that way. I know that as I learn to let go a bit more over the coming years, there will be scrapes, bumps, bruises. That knowledge is by far the scariest thing i’ve had to deal with being your mom… and you are only three! In your life, I won’t always be able to keep my hand on that bike sweet boy… so know this…
Your mom and dad are on thier knees covering you in prayer every day. We need you to know how important your faith is and how much you can trust Jesus to carry you through no matter what. As much as we are looking out for you, there is One who is looking out for you even more then we are. You’re starting to understand slowly, in the way that you pray every night, in the way that you listen to the stories we read you from your little Bible. You are held in the arms of someone far bigger than Mom and Dad. And it’s that knowledge that gives me the peace I need to let go a little bit more each year as you grow in all of your cuteness and intelligence. As insanely-crazy in love with you as we are, Jesus loves you even more!
Next year things will be very different… you will have a new best friend to walk with in life… someone who will look up to you and love you and probably want to be like you. I can’t wait to see how this next year unfolds with little brother. Just remember, you are amazing. Gosh, we are so crazy about you! We always will be!
Now just look at how much you’ve grown!!
With all my love,
Mommy
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